And Just When I Thought I Had it Figured Out…

Being a continuous nomad opens one up to all possibilities.  This can be scary, thrilling, exciting, and difficult.

Like a seed on the wind, I never know where life will take me.  I like it like that, although some people tell me they think this is sad.  Mostly they are projecting their own need for security onto me.  It’s fine to want or need security, but at this point in my life I find security in going with the flow, being receptive to the waves that take me to places unexpected.

Like now for example.

Touring Yosemite with Bear Vasquez

Now, I have lost sight of land.

But hey!  I thought I had a “plan“!

“Ha ha ha!”, says the universe.

Before I arrived in Yosemite, my future host and I talked for hours on the phone.  It was clear that there was a strong mental connection between us, something unusual, and we both expressed concern that when I arrived, we had to keep the volunteer/host dynamic a professional one and not cross any boundaries that would jeopardize reputations on either side.  My host does not have romances with his volunteers.  I don’t have romances with my bosses.

Needless to say, I was fired from my position as a volunteer on Day 2.  That crossed “get fired” off my bucket list (yay!) and allowed the hand-holding that seemed as essential as oxygen.

The connection on all levels was simply too strong to be denied.  Romance has ensued; something I was not seeking and frankly, did not want.  But…like I said…could not be denied.

I could never have guessed the package surrounding the soul I am falling in love with, or the location of that soul in the mountains of Mariposa, California, or the timing which feels inconvenient at best.  But, I’m not going to turn my back on what has presented itself so boldly.  Relationships are another type of adventure which carry their own risks and rewards.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

No matter what happens, I will learn.

One never knows how long anything will last, although we all do a very good job of staying in denial about that difficult fact.  So, we, and I, might as well go for it.

I am living in the moment.

And today, it’s beautiful.  And difficult.  And fun.  And surprising.  And wow.

Art will come.

Just give me a minute.

Me and Bear with Half Dome in the background. Yosemite National Park, California

On our first date. Driving through Mariposa, my thumb is bleeding from fingernail biting, and I’m telling stories. Clearly I’m a comedic genius.

An outing to Mono Lake, California